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Have I got what it takes to be a pole survivor?
by Sarah Warden18/ 8/2005
IF skinny celebs can wrap their stringy limbs round a pole to
take part in the latest exercise craze, then I can do it too.
That was my mantra as I nervously approached the Bierkeller in
Piccadilly for my first experience of the phenomenon of pole
dancing, which any celeb magazine reader knows is the latest
exercise craze for Kate Moss, Sadie Frost et al.
The session, one of two taster events organised by Spice, promised
me an introduction to the finer arts of the dance form and I had
been told I would be performing professional moves by the end of
the day. Me? This had to be a joke.
I had been ordered to wear clothes that would leave my arms and
legs free to grip the pole, along with high heels. This felt rather
odd, but I decided to abandon all thoughts of how strange I felt
and go with the flow. I was helped in this by the other 15 or so
women taking part, who came in various ages, shapes and sizes, were
all very friendly and had never tried pole dancing before
either.
Instructor Michelle took us through a warm-up which felt very
peculiar. If you've never tried stretching your hamstrings while
wearing heels, I recommend you steer clear of it as it adds
considerably to the challenge of balancing.
After this we sat down to watch Michelle demonstrate the routine we
were about to learn. The phrase shock and awe sprang to mind as she
span around the pole at high speed, throwing in various moves that
looked designed to be both erotic and as difficult as extreme
yoga.
The routine was broken down into bits and we tried out each section
in pairs.
Michelle was a brilliant teacher, but I'm not sure anyone would
have been remotely aroused by my attempts to wriggle round the pole
and move up and down, and my self conscious bum slapping and pelvic
thrusting left me feeling more blushed than flushed.
Like all the best sportspeople, she had made something look easy
that appeared very clumsy when carried out by an amateur.
But the group was very supportive, applauding every time someone
got a move right.
And, by hanging on through a mixture of sheer terror and guesswork,
I managed to get my body into all the requisite positions and spin
round the pole without falling off or breaking anything.
In fact, the technical moves got easier as the session went on and
my muscles started to feel the strain so I knew I was getting a
good workout.
But the sexiness was harder to master.
I found it was hard enough to get myself round the pole, down to
the floor, over and up again without remembering to stick my chest
and bottom out and keep my legs together.
I felt less like a siren and more like a bull in a china
shop.
But that didn't affect the fact that I had a good time and a good
chuckle with the other people there.
And when the session ended with a bit of lap dancing instruction,
all inhibitions were thrown to the wind as we giggled our way
through a routine that might have been erotic were it not for the
all-female group trying desperately not to show too much
underwear.
While I rage against the idea of women being exploited in lap
dancing clubs, it certainly didn't seem that any of the women at
the workshop had gone along with any motivation other than to try
something new and get a bit of exercise and maybe a confidence
boost.
And who knows? If I took it up as a regular sport maybe I'd be
whirling and turning with the best of them.
And that might not be a bad idea, as the fact that I couldn't walk
for two days would suggest that it truly is a good workout, and one
that should not be left only to skinny celebrities who have barely
any bums to wiggle.
To try pole dancing at the next workshop on September 3 or any
other events organised by Spice in Manchester, call 0161 240 2080
or go to
www.spicemcr.com
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